How AUTISM Helped Me DEFY the Odds! (PERSONAL)

Featured ~ Donald "Nugget" Arteaga ~ Leave a comment

😲 I WAS DIAGNOSED WITH AUTISM!!! 😲

I use to consider myself a very introverted person, very shy, and very set in my own closed routines. I was more of a thinker than a doer and more a dreamer than a leader. Can you relate to that? If not, can you think of someone in your life who was like that? 🤔

Being diagnosed with Autism in 7th grade was probably the starting point for me, the point where I confirmed these ideas to myself about who I was: something was ‘wrong’ in my brain. 🧠 “I have Autism. It explains why I feel the way I feel. It’s just something that’s a part of me; I can’t change it.” 🤷‍♂️

But even at the time I remember feeling like I didn’t want to be labeled like this. I saw the label before me with all its negativity, a label I needed to object and rebel from. 👊 I saw the stigmas of this label becoming my reality, and once I started seeing it reflected in other people’s behaviors towards me it frightened me to the core! 😨

I have vivid memories from school where I refused to accept new accommodations because of the new label. I was now being offered additional time on tests, opportunities to leave class to ‘cool down’, and every single time I refused. I was being treated differently. I hadn’t changed, but with my new label I had changed in the eyes of everyone else. 😟 Has someone ever said something about you that you knew wasn’t true? Did you ever feel like you just wanted to jump on the defense and say: “That is absolutely NOT TRUE!” 🤬

With my new label I was constantly reminded about my new-given identity: what I couldn’t do, what my limitations were, and what struggles I’d have the rest of my life. 🔮 Very little was I ever reminded about all my current strengths or what I could do. It was mostly the echoes from a set of diagnostic criteria. 📖

In psychology, the term is referred to as a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy. In sociology, it’s referred to as the Labeling Theory. To put it simply: If a person holds a belief in their mind about someone else’s future expectations, the person will unconsciously help in influencing the other person into fulfilling those expectations. 🤔

So for example, if a parent holds a child to very low expectations the odds are very likely the child won’t ever go past the ones the parent already set for them. They will only achieve the most minimal, the expectations set by the parent. 😲

SO FOR A LONG TIME I USE TO LET OTHERS DICTATE HOW I WAS GOING TO LIVE MY LIFE…😔

But then at one point I finally decided I was going on my own path. These past few years I’ve learned that everything starts with Me: I must take control of my life, how I choose to see it, and how I’m going to live it. 👍

📌 Dale Carnegie explained it through his principles to Win Friends and Influence People.

📌 Stephen Covey said it with his Habit of Being Proactive.

📌 The Stoics taught it through their principles of self-control.

📌 The Existentialists shared it through the creation of meanings.

📌 Individuals like Gandhi and Martin Luther King Jr. excelled it through their example.

It’s the power of helping OURSELVES FIRST before we start trying to help the rest of the world. It’s about taking CONTROL over our emotions rather than letting them and our environment control us. It’s about living our lives for a PURPOSE greater than just ourselves. It’s about a “dream”, a vision of a greater future for all of humanity. Most importantly, it’s about YOU DEFINING YOUR LIFE. 🌎

What I’ve come to realize again and again is that my past does not have to equal the future. I’ve realized I am more capable than what any label or diagnosis will dictate. 🙌

Have you ever taken a personality test and it gave you a result you wholeheartedly believed in? “Congrats, you’re an INFJ!” The problem with these tests is they can tell you who you are NOW. But they don’t tell you who you’ll necessarily be in the FUTURE. We can change as well as mentally evolve. It’s a part of who I may be now, but it’s not the final destination! 🛣️

I’ve realized that I ultimately will define Me, not someone else, not a test, and not a set of diagnostic criteria. Otherwise I keep a fixed identity for the rest of my life…nah! 😉

So this year I’ve been on a mission to Transcend Labels. I am showing the world what’s possible, to show others how to look beneath the surface, past the labels, past the stereotypes, and to see each other for who we all are. 👥

I truly believe when we do this we’ll start seeing the humanity within each other, see each other as human beings, and see that we are all more alike than we like to believe. With that not only comes greater understanding for our neighbors but most importantly an unconditional love, because the realization comes: “That person is also Me.” ❤️

I see lasting change in the world happening through the individual from the inside-out, not the outside-in. I believe that the better we can be for ourselves, the better we can be for others. 🌎

Gandhi said: “Be the change you wish to see in the world”. Everyone has an opinion, but there are fewer people out there who ever set the example. Will we be the next examples?! 👌

I WAS DIAGNOSED WITH AUTISM; AN EXPLANATION, BUT NOT THE DESTINATION! 💪

I hope this resonates with many of you. I would appreciate it if you could share this post with others, whoever you believe will also benefit from these words. If there are any additional areas I can add value to your life as well as in the blogging community, please let me know! 🙂

My areas of expertise include:

👍 Detail-oriented, Thoroughness

👍 Quality-over-quantity Focused

👍 Analytical, Systemic Thinking

👍 Emotional intelligence (plus 10 years in Customer Service)

👍 Social media, Building Engagement

With lots of gratitude,

Donald “Ace” Arteaga ❤️

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Why EMBRACE Change!

July 9, 2020 ~ Donald "Nugget" Arteaga ~ Leave a comment

Last year I was in Glasgow visiting the Kelvingrove Art Gallery and Museum. It was such a beautiful museum, I spent nearly 3 hours looking at EVERY nook and cranny! 😍

If you ever want to be reminded of how VAST our world and its history is, take a trip sometime to a museum! 🖼️

At one point, I had entered the section with an ENTIRE wall dedicated to Charles Darwin and his Theory of Evolution! 🦷

Before Darwin, our world had a much MORE simplified explanation as to how our world’s inhabitants came to be. 😅

Contrary to popular belief at the time, Earth is in fact WAY MORE than 6000 years old! 😱

Not only going against conventional understanding, Darwin changed the paradigm of BOTH the religious AND scientific beliefs of his time! 😱

He showed us there was a world FAR MORE complex than what was once thought, presenting ideas which later laid the foundation for MANY subjects we study today including Biology. 🧫

But why do I share this post with you? 🤔

Because there was one KEEN observation Darwin noticed during his studies. Verbatim, I saw this written on the museum wall: ✍️

🌟 “𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐰𝐢𝐧 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐜𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞’𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐞 – 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞.” 🌟

With COVID and everything happening in 2020, I find this quote stretches FAR BEYOND Darwin to our modern world today. Our world is constantly changing, perhaps too fast for many people’s comfort. ⌛

But with this finding from Darwin, I challenge us to take on the this opportunity to continue adapting to whatever comes our way. Because we are greater than our circumstances! 💪

“Change is inevitable. Growth is optional.” ❤️

How Beliefs POSSESS Us!

July 5, 2020 ~ Donald "Nugget" Arteaga ~ Leave a comment

📌 The Optimist believes in the best for the future. Therefore their mind likes to focus on hope and faith.

📌 The Pessimist believes in the worst for the future. Therefore their mind likes to focus on what’s wrong with the world.

📌 The Realist believes in seeing things as they are, not better or worse. Therefore their mind likes to focus on facts, not the emotional stories about the facts.

📌 The Cynic believes in the selfishness of others. Therefore their mind likes to focus on distrusting other people’s “good” or “virtuous” intentions.

What do all these categories have in common? 🤔

𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞. They aren’t “right” or “wrong” necessarily, just ways of seeing the world around you. 👀

𝐄𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐞 𝐚 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞. 🙌

🌟 Our beliefs constantly color and shape how we see life. 🌟

Take an example of people who get into a car accident…

📌 The Optimist expects most of the people in the accident will be okay.

📌 The Pessimist expects most, if not every person in the accident will die.

📌 The Realist measures the probability the people in the accident will live or die based on the facts.

📌 The Cynic assumes the people in the accident were careless and intentionally caused it to collect insurance money.

🌟 𝐖𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐚𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬. 𝐖𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐰𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞. 🌟

Carl Jung talked about how ideas can possess people, rather than people possessing ideas. And when a belief possesses a person, the person is no longer in control. The belief speaks through the person. 🗣️

I must add: beliefs aren’t intrinsically bad. We all have them and need them in order to function. 𝐈𝐭’𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟-𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐟𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐚 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐦. 👍

So how can we check if our beliefs possess us?

📍 Acknowledge most of our beliefs are not even our own. We didn’t carry them from birth. We’ve picked them up over time and embraced them as our own.

📍 Challenge our beliefs. Question how they could be flawed or wrong. Question our ego’s need to hold onto them.

📍 Seek other points of view that challenge our beliefs. Don’t surround ourselves in echo chambers. It doesn’t mean we have to agree with those who disagree with us, but to nevertheless keep an open mind to a different perspective.

If we’re unable to do any of these…we may already have our answer. 🙌

Why Your Shadow MATTERS!

June 28, 2020 ~ Donald "Nugget" Arteaga ~ Leave a comment

💬 “𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐮𝐚𝐥’𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬. 𝐀𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐬, 𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐬 𝐚𝐧 𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐬𝐧𝐚𝐠, 𝐭𝐡𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥-𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬.” ~ 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐥 𝐉𝐮𝐧𝐠 💬

The Shadow is the parts of ourselves we reject, the primal emotions we suppress for the sake of societal approval, the parts we deny out of a personal desire to deny they exist. ❌

You could also think of the Shadow like “the devil on your shoulder”. The Shadow includes the thoughts that come up in your mind you’d never tell anyone else you thought. 👿

Think of an individual who is so kind, so loving, and so quiet. But one day you hear about an incident where they lost their temper, and you think to yourself: “NO! That is NOT the person I know! That is NOT who they are!” 🛑

Or think of the priest who vocally condemns homosexuality in his church but is eventually found to have participated in homosexual acts. 😲

➡️ These are examples of the Shadow at play. ⬅️

𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐥 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐥𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞, 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬. 🔨

𝐖𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐣𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦: “𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥!” 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐢𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐬. 🎭

It’s why there’s so many people with emotional issues. It’s why we have many immature adults, ones who’ve never taken the opportunity to be better in touch with themselves. 😔

Instead, many have unfortunately had to settle for cultural expectations of possessing certain personality traits while suppressing others. 😩

A man needs to always be masculine and suppress his femininity (“Boys don’t cry”), while a female needs to always be feminine and suppress her masculinity (“Girls, know your place”). ↕️

𝐈𝐭’𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐰𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰. 𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐝, 𝐰𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐨 𝐰𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐭. 💯

In some circles like self-help and spirituality, the idea of the Shadow can be frowned upon. “Let go of the things which don’t serve you.” “If you focus on it, the more energy you give to it.” 👎

I understand those perspectives, however I take Carl Jung’s perspective: “I’d rather be whole than good.” I’d rather accept every part of me, the good and the bad, the gentle and the aggressive, than suppress it. 👤

🤔 So, how does one integrate their Shadow? 🤔

The first step is acknowledgment of its existence. Whatever your Shadow is will differ from person to person. 🙌

This DOESN’T mean you have to start expressing your Shadow or have to start identifying with it. It’s simply about acknowledging it, you making a personal commitment to being brutally honest of seeing every part of yourself, whether you are “proud” it or not. 💯

📍 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐥𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐠𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧.

📍 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐥𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.

📍 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐨𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐛𝐢𝐜 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐥𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐬.

📍 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐫. 𝐉𝐞𝐤𝐲𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐥𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐌𝐫. 𝐇𝐲𝐝𝐞.

We acknowledge our capacity for evil while simultaneously choosing to be good. 🎭

As written in The Gulag Archipelago 📖: “If only it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them.

𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐥 𝐜𝐮𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠.” 👤

So, with this acknowledgement and acceptance of our Shadows, we can then take action! 😄

𝐑𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥 𝐮𝐬, 𝐰𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦! 💪

“𝘐 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘢 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥, 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘭𝘦𝘥𝘨𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦’𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘨𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘷𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘳𝘺 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘥𝘷𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴. 😠

𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘐 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘚𝘩𝘢𝘥𝘰𝘸 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴?” 🤔

What are some ways you could use your Shadow energy of anger and aggression for more constructive means?

⚽️ You could take up a competitive sport.

🏋️ You could use this energy in your workouts.

💨 You could use it to get your work done faster.

🙌 You could use it in situations which legitimately call for you to become more aggressive.

𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐬 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐋. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐥𝐲 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰 𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐥𝐲! 😄

It’s what I mean when I tell people “don’t throw out the baby with the bathwater”. 👶

Integrating our Shadow can be VERY useful. But we always need to make sure we’re in control and using it for a healthy means. 😊

𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰, 𝐨𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮? 😈

LET ME KNOW IF YOU FOUND THIS USEFUL! ⬇️

Why “Victimhood Culture” Demands Understanding!

June 20, 2020 ~ Donald "Nugget" Arteaga ~ Leave a comment

😨 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐒 “𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃 𝐂𝐔𝐋𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄”? 😨

Originally coined by sociologists Bradley Campbell and Jason Manning in an academic journal, they were seeking to understand a new and emerging moral culture that was becoming prevalent in our society. 🙌

But please hear me out! 🙏

If you feel inclined to quickly dismiss this term as some right-wing rhetoric, I urge you to hear me out. As a fellow Liberal, allow me to explain and provide greater context. ❤️

The authors clearly state: “𝗢𝘂𝗿 𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗼𝗴𝘆 𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝘂𝘀 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗶𝗯𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗼𝗻, 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗽𝗿𝗮𝗶𝘀𝗲 𝗼𝗿 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗺𝗻 𝗶𝘁. 𝐖𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐕𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐂𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬.” 🙌

Is it fair to say every Culture brings with it a set of pros and cons, benefits and disadvantages? Is it fair to say some of the things these cultures bring may be more helpful, more unhelpful than others? 👍

So, in order for us to better understand what Campbell and Manning mean by “Victimhood Culture”, they say we must first look at 2 previous types of moral cultures: Honor and Dignity Culture.

By placing each of these cultures alongside each other, it can help us better understand their distinct differences. ↔️

𝐈𝐧 𝐚𝐧 𝐇𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐫 𝐂𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 💪:

📌 Reputation and Bravery are key factors of one’s moral status.

🛡️ Small conflicts are responded to aggressively.

🚨 Little to no appeals to authority, third-parties, and public opinion for justice.

🙌 Examples of Honor Culture: the Old West, the mafia.

🗣️ Phrases you’d hear:

“𝘐 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰 𝘢 𝘥𝘶𝘦𝘭!”

“𝘕𝘰 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘴 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺’𝘴 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘪𝘵.”

“𝘕𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴 𝘢 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘩𝘶𝘵 𝘶𝘱.”

𝐈𝐧 𝐚 𝐃𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐂𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 👤:

📌 Self-restraint and Civility are key factors of one’s moral status.

🛡️ Small conflicts are responded to with non-violence and compromise.

🚨 May sometimes appeal to authority, third-parties, or public opinion for justice.

🙌 Examples of Dignity Culture: Formal debate, Court of Law, Due Process

🗣️ Phrases you’d hear:

“𝘚𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘬𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘺 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘮𝘦.”

“𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘰𝘱 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘭.”

“𝘓𝘦𝘵 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘴 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘭𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘮𝘴 𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘶𝘴 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘮𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘶𝘴.”

𝐈𝐧 𝐚 𝐕𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐂𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 😨:

📌 Suffering and Victimization are key factors of one’s moral status.

🛡️ Small conflicts are responded to aggressively (like Honor culture).

🚨 Mostly appeals to authority, third-parties, and public opinion for justice.

🙌 Examples of Victimhood Culture: Callout/Cancel Culture, Microaggressions, Trigger Warnings, Safe Spaces

🗣️ Phrases you’d hear:

“𝘚𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘷𝘪𝘰𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦.”

“𝘐’𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭.”

“𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺’𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴; 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘺!”

With these Cultures presented, Campbell and Manning want to emphasize one very important point about Victimhood Culture ⬇️:

“𝐓𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐠𝐧𝐢𝐳𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐦 𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐞’𝐬 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐬 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐫 𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐦 𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐲𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭. 💯

𝐈𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐫 𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐦 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐫 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐬 𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐲𝐬. 💯

𝐈𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐬 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞. 💯

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞’𝐬 𝐠𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐭. 𝐌𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. 💯

𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐨𝐜𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐳𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦. 🔎

𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐟 𝐰𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐕𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐂𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐞, 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐬𝐦, 𝐰𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞, 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐝𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐕𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐂𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐨𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐲.” 🤷‍♂️

As Campbell and Manning go on to explain, there’s an ongoing culture clash happening right now between Dignity and Victimhood Cultures. ⚔️

It is the same reason why individuals who strongly identify with a Dignity Culture are finding it very difficult to understand Victimhood Culture, and vice versa.

𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐬. ↔️

𝘖𝘯𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯’𝘴 “𝘮𝘪𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘢𝘨𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯” 𝘪𝘯 𝘝𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘊𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯’𝘴 “𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵’𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘮, 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘦” 𝘪𝘯 𝘋𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘊𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦. ↔️

𝘖𝘯𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯’𝘴 “𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥” 𝘪𝘯 𝘝𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘊𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯’𝘴 “𝘐 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦” 𝘪𝘯 𝘋𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘊𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦. ↔️

𝘖𝘯𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯’𝘴 “𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘱𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥” 𝘪𝘯 𝘝𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘊𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯’𝘴 “𝘐’𝘮 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘪𝘳𝘤𝘶𝘮𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘴” 𝘪𝘯 𝘋𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘊𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦. ↔️

𝘖𝘯𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯’𝘴 “𝘷𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘮 𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨” 𝘪𝘯 𝘝𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘊𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯’𝘴 “𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺” 𝘪𝘯 𝘋𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘊𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦. ↔️

Now of course, these are big generalizations, so I’d love to hear everyone’s thoughts on these ideas! 😃

If you’re interested in learning more, I recommend checking out the full-length book! Note: It is an academic read, so it can be dry at times to read, with more sources than full-length pages! 😅

If anything, I hope in sharing these ideas it can spark a discussion and provide additional food for thought to helping us better understand what’s going on right now. ❤️

SOURCES:

📰 Microaggression and Moral Cultures (Academic Journal): https://bit.ly/2Yn8WoN

📄 Microaggressions and the Rise of Victimhood Culture (Atlantic Article): https://bit.ly/2zLXt8F

📖 The Rise of Victimhood Culture (Full-Length Book): https://amzn.to/3eixJzA