❤️ 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐕𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒 𝐈𝐒 𝐁𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄 𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐘 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄! ❤️
I am someone who is gay…I rarely talk about it. 🤷♂
I am someone who is Hispanic…I rarely talk about it. 🤷♂
I am someone who is Liberal…I rarely talk about it. 🤷♂
I am someone who is Atheist…I (especially) rarely talk about it. 🤷♂
Why do I rarely talk about these things? 🤔
Well…let’s take a step back. 👣
Say you were meeting me for the very first time, and the only information you were given about who I am were these labels: 📜
Male. Gay. Hispanic. Liberal. Atheist.
What kind of person comes to your mind that fits into each of these categories? 🤔
What comes to your mind when you think of a “Gay Male”? Flamboyant? Feminine? Limp wrists?
What comes to your mind when you think of an “Atheist?” Snobbish? Science-obsessed? Blasphemous?
Now…take these labels and apply them back to me. And compare these labels to how you 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 know me as a person. 🙋♂️
Let me ask: do these labels easily fit into your general perception of me? 😅
Of Donald Arteaga? 🤷♂️
If your answer is “no”…THAT is the reason why!
🙌 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐈 𝐫𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐞 𝐦𝐲𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐈 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐬. 🙌
I’d rather we all be judged, as Martin Luther King Jr. said, based upon the content of our character. 👤
👍 I don’t intend for you to judge me by virtue of my sexual preference.
👍 I don’t intend for you to judge me by virtue of my race.
👍 I don’t intend for you to judge me by virtue of my political views.
👍 I don’t intend for you to judge me by virtue of my religious affiliation.
THIS is why I generally don’t provide this information to people upfront. I want you to get to know ME first, minus the preconceptions. 🙂
👀 𝐁𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐈 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐳𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐈 𝐚𝐦, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐈 𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐬. 👀
The problem is these labels are only mere facets of who I am as a human being, just as I believe this to be the case for any other human being. 💎
I’ve held this ideal ever since I started my mission to Transcend Labels in 2018. ⏳
The ideal has always been for me to show through my example that people don’t have to be entrenched in their labels. 💯
The ideal has always been for me to show that my diagnosis of Autism is just a temporary explanation and not a final destination. 💯
The ideal has always been for me to show how limiting labels are as frameworks for understanding ourselves and other people. 💯
Consider the facts:
🙌 No one on this planet is 100% exactly the same.
🙌 No one thinks 100% exactly the same way.
🙌 No one has lived 100% exactly the same life as another person.
𝐁𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐢𝐧𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐮𝐬 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠.
𝐁𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐢𝐧𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐚 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧’𝐬 𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐨 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐱 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐮𝐬.
𝐁𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐢𝐧𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐚 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧’𝐬 𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞 𝐚 𝐝𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐧𝐞’𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫.
For me, my mission to Transcend Labels is a life-affirming philosophy that says we are more than our pasts, more than our circumstances, and that we are capable of becoming more than the people we were yesterday. ✊
Perhaps as you read this, this sounds like common sense to you! 😅
But…things seemed to have changed. 🧐
Not with my mission; it remains the same. But I’m talking about within our society. 👥
More and more I continue reading about a growing ideology that:
😱 Encourages people to see each other ONLY for their labels, not for their individuality.
😱 Encourages people to see each other ONLY for their group identities, not for their common humanity.
😱 Encourages people to see each other ONLY in binary camps of either being Oppressors or being Oppressed.
😱 Encourages people to indulge in cognitive biases like mindreading, overgeneralizing, and black-and-white thinking.
This smorgasbord of an ideology has come to be more popularly known as: “being woke”.
(𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘙𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘢 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘞𝘰𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘺, 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 “𝘊𝘺𝘯𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴: 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘈𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘚𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘔𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘌𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘈𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘙𝘢𝘤𝘦, 𝘎𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘵𝘺” 𝘣𝘺 𝘑𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘓𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘴𝘢𝘺 & 𝘏𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘯 𝘗𝘭𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘦.)
Simply put…the very ideals I’ve stood for the past few years are in direct opposition to this ideology. 🤷♂
So perhaps you can understand why a part of me is fascinated at how this ideology has reached such a wide audience, especially among the political Left, with little Critical (pun intended) examination. 😅
Perhaps you can understand my fascination reading about this ideology that argues the very ideals I stand for, the message I’ve promoted for years, can now be entirely summarized under labels such as “white supremacy”, “privilege”, “racist”, “microaggression”, and “offensive”. 🤨
❤️ But I get it. ❤️
I understand in these current times A LOT of us are stressed out and worried. I understand it’s hard for anyone to think clearly, let alone rationally, when our minds are shrouded in weeds. 😖
𝐈 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐢𝐧 𝐧𝐮𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐝, 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐱 𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐝𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐬.
If I were to combine every negative event which has happened the past year, I can’t blame someone for not feeling comfortable with all this Uncertainty. 😨
As I saw 1 tweet put it: “𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐠𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐥 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐲𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐲.” ❤️
So yes, I definitely understand that lots of people at this time will be desperate to find something which helps them get back to Certainty, back to some sense of clarity and normalcy, back to some sense of renewed purpose and meaning…even if that means embracing an over-simplistic, fringe ideology like this one. 🙌
And THIS is one of the main reasons why I’ve not spoken up about this topic personally. 𝐈’𝐦 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝’𝐬 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞. 😭
At the moment, the child needs something, anything to stay calm and feel safe. 🛡
Don’t get me wrong, there are 100% real problems in our society that still need to be solved. I’m not here to pretend like everything is all fine and dandy. It’s not.
But we’re not going to solve them when we’re making the incorrect diagnoses, which in turn provide the wrong solutions. 👎
𝐖𝐞’𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐨𝐥𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐱 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐦𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐨𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐭𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫-𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦. 👎
But that part of the discussion will be saved for another post…
My point is: THIS is not the way forward. ❌
🤬 “𝑾𝑬𝑳𝑳 𝑴𝑹. 𝑯𝑰𝑮𝑯-𝑨𝑵𝑫-𝑴𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻𝒀 𝑫𝑶𝑵𝑨𝑳𝑫, 𝑮𝑶𝑻 𝑨𝑵𝒀 𝑩𝑬𝑻𝑻𝑬𝑹 𝑰𝑫𝑬𝑨𝑺?!” 🤬
I believe I do! And it goes right back to what I was talking about earlier. 😊
🙌 We move forward by focusing on our common humanity.
🙌 We move forward by focusing on what we have in common.
🙌 We move forward by NOT assuming malicious intent of those who disagree with us.
🙌 We move forward by focusing on understanding and less on labeling.
𝐖𝐞 𝐃𝐈𝐅𝐅𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐛𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲.
𝐖𝐞 𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐛𝐢𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐣𝐮𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐛𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲.
𝐖𝐞 𝐀𝐂𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖𝐋𝐄𝐃𝐆𝐄 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐰𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞…𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐒𝐄 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐰𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐧.
For every time we do this, we’ll remind our survival brain who’s in charge of how we connect with others. 🧠
We’ll remind our survival brain how naïve the caricatures we create in our minds about mass groups of people are. 🧠
𝐈𝐟 𝐰𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐨𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐭𝐲, 𝐥𝐞𝐭’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐧𝐞𝐠𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐮𝐬. 𝐑𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐞’𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞.
Because what’s the alternative?
👎 A society which is OBSESSED with focusing on what makes us separate from each other.
👎 A society which DISCRIMINATES people based primarily upon their labels.
👎 A society which attempts to solve the problem of prejudice…with EVEN MORE PREJUDICE.
That doesn’t sound like a desirable outcome, does it? Sounds a bit backwards, right? It’s honestly quite IL-liberal! 😅
But…thankfully we don’t have to go down that route! We don’t have to become “woke”! 💯
I challenge you to come with me and take the road less traveled. It’s important to remember that just because something is popular in the moment doesn’t automatically mean it’s right. 👍
I challenge you to come with me and use what might be considered a more “radical” approach these days to connecting with others:
𝐓𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐬 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭. 𝐓𝐨 𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭, 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤. 𝐓𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐜𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞. 𝐓𝐨 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐟𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐞. 𝐓𝐨 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬.
But if all this sounds too overwhelming, how about just this…?
𝐘𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐚 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠. 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐈’𝐦 𝐚 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠. 👥
𝐋𝐞𝐭’𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞. 🙂
𝐍𝐨 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞. 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐧𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬. ❤️