Why Your Emotions MATTER!

๐Ÿ›‘ย ๐—ฌ๐—ข๐—จ๐—ฅ ๐—˜๐— ๐—ข๐—ง๐—œ๐—ข๐—ก๐—ฆ ๐—”๐—ฅ๐—˜ ๐—ก๐—ข๐—ง ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”๐— !!!ย ๐Ÿ›‘

Do you ever feel lonely?ย โ˜น๏ธ

We all have at points in our lives. It’s important to add there’s a difference between “feeling lonely” and “being alone”. A person can be with a group of people and feel lonely. A person can be completely alone and feel fine.ย ๐Ÿ‘

So why do topics like mental health continue to be an issue in our society? I’ll give you 1 BIG reason:

โš ๏ธย ๐— ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐˜† ๐—ฝ๐—ฒ๐—ผ๐—ฝ๐—น๐—ฒ ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ท๐—ฒ๐—ฐ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ถ๐—ฟ ๐—ฒ๐—บ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€ ๐—ฑ๐˜‚๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ณ๐—น๐˜‚๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฐ๐—ฒ ๐—ผ๐—ณ ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€.ย โš ๏ธ

We’ve been taught to believe that emotions are a sign of weakness, that they aren’t useful in our modern world.ย ๐Ÿ˜”

๐Ÿ—ฃย “๐™…๐™ช๐™จ๐™ฉ ๐™—๐™š ๐™๐™–๐™ฅ๐™ฅ๐™ฎ!”ย ๐Ÿ—ฃ

๐Ÿ—ฃย “๐™”๐™ค๐™ช ๐™๐™–๐™ซ๐™š ๐™ฃ๐™ค ๐™ง๐™š๐™–๐™จ๐™ค๐™ฃ ๐™ฉ๐™ค ๐™›๐™š๐™š๐™ก ๐™ฉ๐™๐™ž๐™จ ๐™ฌ๐™–๐™ฎ!”ย ๐Ÿ—ฃ

๐Ÿ—ฃย “๐™”๐™ค๐™ช’๐™ง๐™š ๐™—๐™š๐™ž๐™ฃ๐™œ ๐™ž๐™ง๐™ง๐™–๐™ฉ๐™ž๐™ค๐™ฃ๐™–๐™ก!”ย ๐Ÿ—ฃ

In people’s good intentions, they unfortunately made the problem worse. In their good intentions, they failed to meet the other person inside their emotional home.ย ๐Ÿ 

Why? Because many of them aren’t able or are willing to go in there themselves.ย ๐Ÿ˜ฒ

๐ŸŒŸย ๐—œ๐—ณ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐—ป๐˜ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—น๐—ฝ ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—บ๐—ฒ๐—ผ๐—ป๐—ฒ, ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—บ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐˜ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ป ๐˜„๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ง๐—›๐—˜๐—ฌ ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ฎ๐˜, ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜ ๐˜„๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ฌ๐—ข๐—จ ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐—ป๐˜ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—บ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ.ย ๐ŸŒŸ

Because we’ve been taught so long not to accept our emotions is the reason why it’s a larger problem today. Psychologist Carl Jung said: “Whatever you resist persists and grows larger in size.”ย ๐Ÿ’ฌ

I see our current mental health crisis as the long-term response to embracing the idea of denying our emotions (which is in and of itself irrational as emotional beings). This bubble of “resistance” has grown so large that it’s finally burst. The pendulum is now swinging in the opposite direction.ย ๐Ÿคฌ

But with noting the problem, what is the solution?

๐ŸŒŸย ๐—ช๐—ฒ ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐˜€๐˜๐—ผ๐—ฝ ๐—ฝ๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ต๐—ผ๐—น๐—ผ๐—ด๐—ถ๐˜‡๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ฒ๐—บ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€, ๐—ฒ๐˜€๐—ฝ๐—ฒ๐—ฐ๐—ถ๐—ฎ๐—น๐—น๐˜† ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐—ด๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ถ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ ๐—ผ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐˜€.ย ๐ŸŒŸ

What if we could see our emotions not as spam to delete but as mail giving us an important message about our lives?ย ๐Ÿ“ญ

What if we could see our emotions not as biological defects but as essential character traits for our evolutionary survival?ย ๐Ÿ’ช

How different would our society be if we stopped treating our emotions as nuisances and more as essential tools for our personal growth?ย ๐Ÿง 

I understand why some will disagree with me here:

๐Ÿ˜กย “๐‘ฐ๐’‡ ๐’š๐’๐’– ๐’๐’†๐’• ๐’‘๐’†๐’๐’‘๐’๐’† ๐’‡๐’๐’„๐’–๐’” ๐’๐’ ๐’•๐’‰๐’†๐’Š๐’“ ๐’๐’†๐’ˆ๐’‚๐’•๐’Š๐’—๐’† ๐’†๐’Ž๐’๐’•๐’Š๐’๐’๐’”, ๐’š๐’๐’– ๐’†๐’๐’‚๐’ƒ๐’๐’† ๐’•๐’‰๐’†๐’Ž ๐’•๐’ ๐’‡๐’†๐’†๐’ ๐’Ž๐’๐’“๐’† ๐’…๐’†๐’‘๐’“๐’†๐’”๐’”๐’†๐’…!”

๐Ÿ˜กย “๐‘ฌ๐’Ž๐’๐’•๐’Š๐’๐’๐’” ๐’Ž๐’‚๐’Œ๐’† ๐’š๐’๐’– ๐’Š๐’“๐’“๐’‚๐’•๐’Š๐’๐’๐’‚๐’! ๐‘พ๐’† ๐’๐’†๐’†๐’… ๐’๐’†๐’”๐’” ๐’†๐’Ž๐’๐’•๐’Š๐’๐’๐’” ๐’‚๐’๐’… ๐’Ž๐’๐’“๐’† ๐’๐’๐’ˆ๐’Š๐’„ ๐’‚๐’” ๐’•๐’‰๐’† ๐’”๐’๐’๐’–๐’•๐’Š๐’๐’!”

It’s funny because I very much agree with these statements, but to an extent. I definitely don’t want to enable anyone to feel more depressed. That’s the last thing I’d want to have happen! I also am a huge advocate for logic, reason, and critical thinking. I believe they’re crucial skills for the epistemic crises we will face.ย ๐Ÿ‘Œ

So I won’t throw either of those criticisms away but to say we can EXTEND on them!ย ๐Ÿ‘

โค๏ธย ๐—œ’๐—บ ๐˜๐—ฎ๐—น๐—ธ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ฎ๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐˜ ๐˜‚๐˜€๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ฒ๐—บ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€ ๐—ถ๐—ป ๐—ฎ๐—ป ๐—ถ๐—ป๐˜๐—ฒ๐—น๐—น๐—ถ๐—ด๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜ ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐˜†, ๐˜„๐—ถ๐˜๐—ต ๐—ถ๐—ป๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป, ๐˜„๐—ถ๐˜๐—ต ๐—ฝ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ฝ๐—ผ๐˜€๐—ฒ, ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜ ๐—ฎ๐˜€ ๐—ฎ๐—ป ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฑ๐˜‚๐—น๐—ด๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฐ๐—ฒ.ย โค๏ธ

๐ŸŒŸย ๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ’๐˜€ ๐—ฎ ๐—ฑ๐—ถ๐—ณ๐—ณ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฐ๐—ฒ ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ๐˜๐˜„๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—ป ๐—ฎ๐—น๐—น๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—บ๐—ฒ๐—ผ๐—ป๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ณ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—น ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ถ๐—ฟ ๐—ฒ๐—บ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€ ๐—ณ๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€๐˜๐—ฟ๐˜‚๐—ฐ๐˜๐—ถ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—น๐˜‚๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€ ๐˜ƒ๐˜€. ๐—ฎ๐—น๐—น๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—บ๐—ฒ๐—ผ๐—ป๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ณ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—น ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ถ๐—ฟ ๐—ฒ๐—บ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€ ๐˜€๐—ถ๐—บ๐—ฝ๐—น๐˜† ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฑ๐˜„๐—ฒ๐—น๐—น ๐—ถ๐—ป ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—บ.ย ๐ŸŒŸ

Mental health is so easily swept under the rug because it can be an unpleasant topic to discuss. The very reason we “resist” talking about it is the reason why it will “persist” and be discussed!ย ๐Ÿ‘

๐ŸŒŸย ๐—ช๐—ต๐—ถ๐—น๐—ฒ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐—บ๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜ ๐—ฝ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—ป๐—ฎ๐—น๐—น๐˜† ๐—ณ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—น ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐—ด๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ถ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ ๐—ฒ๐—บ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€ ๐—ฑ๐—ฎ๐—ถ๐—น๐˜†, ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ฝ๐—น๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜๐˜† ๐—ผ๐—ณ ๐—ฝ๐—ฒ๐—ผ๐—ฝ๐—น๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ ๐—ฑ๐—ผ.ย ๐ŸŒŸ

The fact that a lot of us (including myself at times) aren’t willing to discuss it says a lot about how we treat our emotions in our society.ย ๐Ÿ˜Ÿ

Again, it’s NOT about dwelling on our emotions! That’s the last thing I want people to presume with what I say here!ย ๐Ÿ‘

โค๏ธย ๐—œ’๐—บ ๐˜๐—ฎ๐—น๐—ธ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ฎ๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐˜ ๐˜‚๐˜€๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ฒ๐—บ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€ ๐—ถ๐—ป ๐—ฎ๐—ป ๐—ถ๐—ป๐˜๐—ฒ๐—น๐—น๐—ถ๐—ด๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜ ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐˜†, ๐˜„๐—ถ๐˜๐—ต ๐—ถ๐—ป๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป, ๐˜„๐—ถ๐˜๐—ต ๐—ฝ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ฝ๐—ผ๐˜€๐—ฒ, ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜ ๐—ฎ๐˜€ ๐—ฎ๐—ป ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฑ๐˜‚๐—น๐—ด๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฐ๐—ฒ.ย โค๏ธ

I share this with you all today:

โ˜ฏ๏ธย ๐—ฆ๐—ผ ๐˜„๐—ฒ ๐—ฎ๐˜€ ๐—ฎ ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—ฐ๐—ถ๐—ฒ๐˜๐˜† ๐—ฎ๐—น๐—น๐—ผ๐˜„ ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—น๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐˜€ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ ๐—ผ๐—ธ๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐˜„๐—ถ๐˜๐—ต ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฒ๐˜…๐—ถ๐˜€๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฐ๐—ฒ ๐—ผ๐—ณ ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ฒ๐—บ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€.

โ˜ฏ๏ธย ๐—ฆ๐—ผ ๐˜„๐—ฒ ๐—ฐ๐—ฎ๐—ป ๐—น๐—ฒ๐˜ ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—น๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐˜€ ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐—ต ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐—ธ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜„ ๐—ถ๐˜’๐˜€ ๐—ผ๐—ธ๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜ ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ ๐—ผ๐—ธ๐—ฎ๐˜†, ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฎ๐—ฏ๐—น๐—ฒ ๐—ฏ๐˜‚๐˜ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐—ฐ๐—ฒ๐—ฝ๐˜ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฝ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜ ๐—บ๐—ผ๐—บ๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜.

โ˜ฏ๏ธย ๐—ฆ๐—ผ ๐˜„๐—ฒ ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜๐—ถ๐—ป๐˜‚๐—ฒ ๐—ฏ๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ฎ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐˜€๐˜€ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ถ๐˜€๐˜€๐˜‚๐—ฒ.

โ˜ฏ๏ธย ๐—ฆ๐—ผ ๐˜„๐—ฒ ๐—ฐ๐—ฎ๐—ป ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜๐—ถ๐—ป๐˜‚๐—ฒ ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ฝ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€๐—ถ๐˜€๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜ ๐—ถ๐—ป ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ณ๐—ผ๐—ฐ๐˜‚๐˜€ ๐—ผ๐—ป ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—น๐˜‚๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€.

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SHARE so others hear this message!ย โค๏ธ

How Acceptance SOLVES Problems!

๐ŸŒŸย Focusing on problems is a habit. And so is focusing on solutions.

The problem is when we don’t see any other option than to complain. It’s hard-wired in our evolution to focus on what’s wrong; it’s our survival brain doing its job to protect us. But there is in fact another option…โ˜๏ธ

Accept reality just as it is.ย ๐Ÿ™Œ

๐Ÿ—ฃ๏ธย “That’s ridiculous Donald! There’s so much injustice in the world! How can you ‘accept’ when there’s so much injustice and atrocities?!”ย ๐Ÿ—ฃ๏ธ

Let me clarify: Accepting life as it is does not mean you are ignoring the injustice, corruption, or things that are wrong in the world. Acceptance is so you don’t allow your ego to control your emotions.ย ๐Ÿ—ฏ๏ธ

When you constantly focus on what others “should” or “shouldn’t” be doing, fighting about what “should” or “shouldn’t” be happening in the world, you will also find more of it.

๐ŸŒŸย Whatever you focus on consistently, your mind places a focus to keep finding more of it in your life.ย ๐ŸŒŸ

So if you’re always looking for what’s wrong in your life, your mind, like Google, will be sure to find a huge amount of search results with the keyword: “What’s wrong in my life?”ย ๐Ÿ’ป

But when you accept things as they are, you free yourself from unnecessary suffering. You let go of the emotional baggage which comes from focusing on a problem, so you have a clear head to better focus on solutions.ย ๐Ÿ˜Š

The Stoic philosopher Epictetus said: โ€œWhat upsets people is not things themselves but their judgments about the things.โ€ When you’re judging, you cannot accept.

๐ŸŒŸย When you argue with reality, you always lose.ย ๐ŸŒŸ

If I told you to NOT think about a pink elephant, what are you thinking about right now? And what if I told you to STOP thinking about it, what remains in your mind?ย ๐Ÿ˜

But what if I told you to be absolutely okay that the thought of a pink elephant crossed your mind? Be absolutely okay, accepting of the thought, and then choose to let it go. I’d be curious to know how fast your mind starts to focus on other things.ย ๐Ÿ˜‰

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How Emotions Are HABITS!

“I HAVE A RIGHT TO BE OFFENDED!”ย ๐Ÿคฌ

There’s no question: we all get upset at times in our lives. Sad. Frustrated. Angry. Fearful. Perhaps even hateful.

In fact, these negative emotions are some of the easiest for human beings to experience. It’s hard-wired in us.ย ๐Ÿ˜ฒ

It’s known as Negativity Bias, just 1 of many cognitive biases which affect our ability as human beings to see the world in an objective manner.ย ๐Ÿ˜ฑ

Instead of seeing the world as it is, as a matter of fact, we usually see it through many lens filters of cognitive biases.ย ๐ŸŒŽ

So it makes practical sense to me when I see people get passionate about experiencing negative emotions. Our brains which evolved to help us survive needed those emotions in times of defense and protection.ย ๐Ÿ‘

But there are times when negative emotions become excessive, one where instead of being useful it becomes an emotional home for people.ย ๐Ÿ˜ฑ

“Wait! You can’t be saying that people LIKE to feel upset! That’s ridiculous!”ย ๐Ÿ—ฃ๏ธ

I’d love for you to try my jacket on for a moment.ย ๐Ÿงฅ

Think of your emotions as similar to habits. We all have habits, some good and some bad. But wait, why do we keep bad habits? Why do we hold onto bad habits which don’t benefit us yet can cause us long-term harm?ย ๐Ÿค”

๐ŸŒŸย Because it’s far more comfortable keeping bad habits than it is creating new ones to replace them.ย ๐ŸŒŸ

Or when we attempt to build new habits, we stop trying and we fall back into old habits. Like the saying: “Old habits die hard!”ย ๐Ÿ˜…

So like habits, what if our emotions work in a similar way? What if we keep experiencing emotional states of mind not because they necessarily help us but because they’re the places we’re most comfortable, an emotional home we’re most familiar with, a place where we have certainty over our lives?ย ๐Ÿ 

It sounds self-defeating, and like our bad habits it is too! ๐Ÿ™

One has the “right” to be offended. One has the “right” to feel angry. One has the “right” to judge, criticize, condemn, and generalize people and things all they want. You will get a temporary feeling of power.ย ๐Ÿ’ช

But it never lasts. The question: does it serve a person to feel negative emotions? Or are they perhaps bad habits needing to be broken?ย ๐Ÿค”

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Why We Should ACCEPT Our Emotions!

โš ๏ธย WE REPRESS WHAT WE WONโ€™T ACCEPT!!!ย โš ๏ธ

Last Friday I went into the city to help out at an event at the United Center. Needless to say, Service was the name of the game once again.ย ๐Ÿ™Œ

At this point that should just be my middle name, right?!ย ๐Ÿ˜‚

I woke up at 4am, boarded the train at 5:20am, arrived in the city at 6:20am, and got to the Center in time for the 7am meetup. I got to meet some old and new faces. I made a few new friends. I got to hear a bit of the speakers. And overall it was a fun time!ย ๐Ÿ˜„

It was around the late evening when I got back to Union Station to depart home back in the suburbs. If I had to describe how I was feeling at the time, it would simply be: exhausted. It was a fun day, but I was also ready to crash!ย ๐Ÿ˜

I felt like a walking zombie as I wandered through the train station: half-alive, half-focused, and empty-headed. The only difference was I didnโ€™t crave any human flesh but my bed so I could get some sleep!ย ๐ŸงŸ

Iโ€™ve experienced these kinds of moments a few times the past few years, these moments where Iโ€™m feeling so completely exhausted. But at the same time, Iโ€™m also fascinated with them too!ย ๐Ÿ˜ฒ

For a temporary moment in time, I’ve become devoid of meaning and purpose. For a moment in time, I’m devoid of any thoughts about my life or who Donald Arteaga is. And all the while Iโ€™m feeling like a zombie, thereโ€™s also a part of my brain that is self-aware of it happening!ย ๐Ÿง 

Itโ€™s why as I wait for the train to arrive, I keep trying change my focus to things other than my exhaustion. I start thinking about the things in my life Iโ€™m grateful for. I keep trying to change my focus to things other than my current feelings. It works for short boostsโ€ฆbut my mind quickly wanders back to the visual of my bed Bed. Bed. Bed. Bed. Bed.ย ๐Ÿ›๏ธ

Getting to my bed, for that moment in time, had become my Ultimate Life Purpose!ย ๐Ÿ˜‚

It sounds silly, right?! But perhaps Abraham Maslow was right when he said the #1 need of human beings is getting their Physiological needs met: food, water, shelter, clothing, and (yes!) sleep.ย ๐Ÿ˜ด

๐Ÿ›‘ย But there was an even bigger problem I wasnโ€™t seeing at the time!

๐Ÿ›‘

“What was it?”

๐Ÿ‘Žย I was trying to pushing away what my emotions were communicating.

๐Ÿ‘Žย I was trying to deny what I was feeling.

๐Ÿ‘Žย I was refusing to accept my current state of exhaustion.

I share this post with you all because I believe thereโ€™s a CRUCIAL detail so many of us keep missing when weโ€™re trying to change our emotions. And because we miss this detail, we are REPRESSING what we feel rather than ACCEPTING it!ย โš ๏ธ

Whatโ€™s the difference between repression and acceptance of our emotions?ย ๐Ÿค”

๐Ÿ“Œย Repressing is denying to yourself the emotions you are currently feeling. You pretend like theyโ€™re not there with a mask of another emotion. When youโ€™re angry and deny youโ€™re feeling angry, that anger may build up and come bursting out later in a way you donโ€™t want it to.

๐Ÿ“Œย Accepting is acknowledging what youโ€™re currently feeling AND being okay with it. You may not like the current emotions youโ€™re feeling, but you nonetheless accept them before you make the conscious choice to change them.

The problem was I was repressing, rather than accepting, my feelings of exhaustion. I kept telling myself: โ€œWake up! Don’t be tired!โ€ and tried pushing it away with alternatives.ย ๐Ÿ‘Š

๐ŸŒŸย It wasnโ€™t until I accepted my feelings of exhaustion that its focus in my mind started to dissolve.ย ๐ŸŒŸ

Have you ever had a moment where you felt resentment towards someone, and you kept telling yourself you couldnโ€™t โ€œlet it goโ€? Acceptance is another form of letting go. But in order to let go of your resentment, you have to first acknowledge you’re feeling resentment, and be okay that you’re feeling it.

๐ŸŒŸย We can’t work on an effective solution if we won’t acknowledge what the problem is.ย ๐ŸŒŸ

Our society likes to tell us what we should and shouldn’t feel. We should be strong when we’re feeling weak. We should be happy when we’re sad. It’s all with good intentions, and they have a point about changing our emotions. The problem is they miss the detail of Acceptance.

๐ŸŒŸย In order for anyone to change their emotions effectively, they first have to accept the current emotions they’re feeling and be okay with them. Then the change can begin!ย ๐ŸŒŸ

๐Ÿ›‘ย THE WRONG WAY: “I shouldn’t feel depressed. I will force myself to feel happy.”

โœ…ย THE RIGHT WAY: “I am feeling depressed. There’s nothing wrong with that; it’s a natural human emotion. But now I do want to feel happier, so I am going to take actions to make that happen!”

As I was riding on the train back home I started to accept my feelings. I let myself be okay with feeling exhausted. I didn’t negatively judge myself for it. After all, I had been awake for over 18 hours. Could I really blame my body for feeling like that?! I can definitely tell you: I had a DEEP sleep that night!ย ๐Ÿ’ค

So again: in order for anyone to change their emotions effectively, they first have to accept the current emotions they’re feeling and be okay with them. Then the change can begin!ย ๐ŸŒŸ

If this made sense to you, I’d appreciate it if you SHARE this post. I know there are many who need to hear this in a society that encourages repression over acceptance!ย ๐Ÿ˜”

Much love!ย โค๏ธย #TranscendLabels

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