Why Not EVERY Voice in Your Head Matters!

“How could I be so stupid?!” 😫

“Why do I keep making the same mistake?!” 😫

“Why can’t I do anything right?!” 😩

These are things I use to say to myself!Β πŸ™‹β€β™‚οΈ

Did you know we are our harshest self critics? There’s no one out there that can criticize and cause us as much mental stress as the critic within our minds! 🧠

Why does this voice exist?!

πŸ“Β It is the echoes of other people’s opinions about you. You believe these opinions, no matter how empty they are, have some element of truth to them.

πŸ“Β It is when the expectations you hold for yourself are not met. Your survival brain doesn’t like change/uncertainty.

But here’s the #1 thing I want you to remember: IT’S JUST A VOICE!Β πŸ—£οΈ

🌟 You don’t have to identify with every voice that pops into your head. 🌟

Throughout the day you’re going to have many voices come into your mind. But the best part is you don’t have to embrace every voice as fact. 😁

If there’s anything meditation taught me, the mind is like the weather: it’s always changing from one condition to the next.Β πŸ§˜β€β™‚οΈ

🧠 Allow the Voice of the Critic to speak in your mind. Accept the criticism unconditionally (be indifferent). And pretty soon you will hear less and less of the Voice. 🧠

In other words, there’s plenty more voices in your mind worth holding on to. Just not this one! ❀️

Why “How” Matters MORE Than “What”!

The words I’m saying to you now are the words I wish my younger self would’ve been told.Β πŸ—£οΈ

Sure, he was told at times to stop caring about what other people thought. He was told at times to stop people pleasing.Β πŸ›‘

But he didn’t know how…😫

πŸ—£οΈΒ “What do you mean ‘how’? You just do it, Donald! Simple as that!”Β πŸ—£οΈ

I understand your perspective, and if it works for you I’m very happy it does. That’s great! But I’ll share with you another perspective I’ve also learned.Β πŸ“–

Sometimes what people need the most is NOT hearing the solutions. In fact, these people have often heard the solutions MULTIPLE times! 😲

No, what they actually need is a compass to navigate themselves, their emotions and their intellect, towards the solutions. 🧭

In other words, they don’t need the answers to the “What?” They need the answers to the “How?”Β πŸ™Œ

In other words, telling someone to stop caring what others think is far easier said than done. The problem is you’re telling someone What to do, not How to do it.Β πŸ‘

You can tell a person all you want to fish. But if they’ve never been taught how to fish, how do you expect them to know?Β πŸ€”

🌟 You can’t expect someone to know what they don’t know. 🌟

I wish I could’ve told my younger self the Hows of messages like the one above. I wish I could’ve shared with him this How, that inner happiness and fulfillment matters more than other people’s opinion of him.Β πŸ’¬

I’ll leave you with one statement, however blunt, that reminds me how silly it is to worry so much about what others think. Much love! ❀️

🀯 If you worry what other people think, you’re letting someone else’s imagination control your reality. 🀯

Why Your Mind is a GARDEN!

Have you ever found yourself focusing on a situation that was NOT making you happy? πŸ€”

One negative thought after another, you started to feel more and more crappy. 😑

But you didn’t think of changing the thoughts in your mind. 😲

There’s a reason Jim Rohn said: “Every day, stand guard at the door of your mind.” πŸ’¬

Your mind is like a garden. Whatever seeds you plant they will expand in your daily thoughts. 🎍

What seeds are you planting regularly? Seeds of Problems? Seeds of Solutions? Seeds of Gratitude? Seeds of Anger? 🌱

The problem is when we think we aren’t in control of our minds. We are, just not in the way we might think. 😲

What’s out of our control is the thoughts that cross our minds. No doubt. But what’s in our control is our choice to attach and respond to these thoughts.Β You start to realize this when you do practices like meditation. You are more in control that you think. πŸ§˜β€β™‚οΈ

🌟 Control your mind or your mind controls you. 🌟

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Why You DON’T Remember Your Past!

😱 YOU DON’T REMEMBER YOUR PAST (REALLY)! 😱

Did you know I make these social media posts not just for you all but also for myself? Yeah I know! I’m so selfish right?! πŸ˜‚

For me, these posts I create are not only to share with you but they’re also friendly reminders to myself. My Future Self. It’s so he never forgets the memories I’m choosing to retain for him. ❀️

Now perhaps what I just said sounds a bit odd; what do I mean: “retain”?! Let me ask you this: do you remember every single waking moment of your whole entire life? I highly doubt it. πŸ˜‰

What if I told you with every memory you have, you also have the choice to choose which parts you’ll take with you into your future. 😱

No this isn’t some voodoo! I’m talking about:

πŸ“Œ The parts of your past you choose to continue focusing on

πŸ“Œ The parts of your past which mattered to you the most

πŸ“Œ The parts of your past you defined as shaping you into the person you are today

Think of a family photo where everyone looks so cheerful and is enjoying themselves. But in actuality, the real moment wasn’t as cheerful as the photo made it out to be. The family was simply posing for a photo, putting on forced smiles for the camera. πŸ“Έ

And say a few years later a family member comes across the photo. They barely remember the actual moment, but their only reference is now this photo. This cheerful photo. Thus, that family member starts to believe the past moment was in fact a pleasant one. But remember: it actually wasn’t. 😲

🌟 We don’t remember our pasts as a matter of fact. We remember the stories we created about our pasts. 🌟

So when I say “retain”, it’s a matter of questions to ask of oneself: What do I want to remember for my future? What stories will I choose to continue remembering about my past? What stories am I willing to let go of? πŸ€”

Even more importantly: How will I choose to ultimately define my past? Are the moments I once felt negative about now the thorns I carry? 😑 Or will I now decide to see each thorn as a blessing in disguise instead? 🌻

🌟 It’s less about what actually happened in our pasts and more about how we’re choosing to interpret them for our future. 🌟

This photo was taken as I sat atop Dunure Castle. I share this photo because it’s how I want to remember this moment in time. ⏰ This photo is what I want to represent that moment for my Future Self to see later. And whatever else I write here about this moment is what I’m consciously choosing for my Future Self to keep on remembering. 😊

While we certainly remember key moments from our posts, we often forget the smaller details and retain what we wish to remember. That being said, I want to make sure my Future Self also remember this about this moment:

πŸ“ How in awe I was sitting atop there, how grand it all felt to me.

πŸ“ How my friend Kris Nimbley took the photo and was using the Rule of Thirds I told him about.

πŸ“ How it was a chilly and windy day, but the scenery dissolved the complaints I had in my mind.

πŸ“ How it was one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever visited, how I wanted to stay there for hours.

Choose what you will remember and how you will define it. Because however you define it now is what’s going to shape the rest of your life. ❀️ #EudaimonicLife

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