Why Self-Help NEEDS Patience!

🗣️ “I’m ready to become my best self! Where’s the secret sauce?” 🗣️

Well let’s hold on a second here! 🛑 I appreciate the enthusiasm, but I think this requires some clarification! 😅

Do you really want to become your best self? I also want to become my best self, so we’re in this together! 🤝

But there’s a common misconception in the self-help community that needs to be addressed. In fact, I think it’s one the first things people need to know when they decide to work on themselves. 👍

You’re not going to be told it in our modern society. We live in a day and age which thrives on instant gratification. 💨

📍 Want an item from Amazon? Get it delivered to your door next day!

📍 Want to watch a movie? Click and stream it online!

📍 Want an answer to a random question? Ask Siri on your iPhone!

And let me add these are all GREAT things! The advances in science and technology have brought us so much convenience than we had a decade ago! It should definitely be applauded! 👏

But what I want to emphasize is with personal growth, it’s VERY different! You could even say personal growth is like entering a different culture! 😲

Why? Because when you want to better yourself, to build new habits, to focus on accomplishing goals, and to do all this the rest of your life…well let me assure there’s not going to be any overnight shipping for this! 😅

🌟 Becoming your best self will not offer the same conveniences our modern society does. 🌟

It’s going to take time. It’s going to require dedication. You’ll be stepping into uncharted territories. And it will be a journey, not a destination. 🧭

It’s easy for us to start working on ourselves, not see the results we want, and we quickly give up. Again, our society reinforces instant gratification. 👍

But think of something in your life you want to work on, to become better at, to improve within yourself. And I want you to think about your Future Self, what he/she would say to you if you embarked on this long-term venture. 🗣️

Becoming your best self is not for me. It’s for you. It’s for your Future Self. It’s because you have only one life to live. ⌛

🌟 Netflix is instant. Living a life is not. 🌟

Why Patience is NOT a Virtue!

🙌 PATIENCE IS NOT A VIRTUE! 🙌

One thing I’ve learned is a lot of people don’t have patience. 😲

We’d rather have the quick fix. We’d rather choose the fastest solution. We’d rather get things done sooner than later. 💨

And that is absolutely crucial when applying it to our modern day technology. We do need those skills! The problem is when we carry these same standards into our interactions with other people. 👥

I’ve been told by quite a few people I have a lot of patience. I’ll let someone talk for a long period of time. I’ll give someone extra time to work through a problem in their mind. I’ll let someone know through my presence their concerns matter to me. ❤️

But what surprises me the most is that this patience is not commonplace. You’ve heard the term “patience is a virtue” right?! ✍️

So how do I have it so easily? It’s simple: I think if I were in the same position as them, I’d appreciate the same treatment towards me. ↔️

If you’re not patient with others, the odds are likely you are not patient with yourself. How you treat others is also a reflection on how you treat yourself. 👤

There are people working through far bigger problems in their lives than I’ve ever had to deal with. And the biggest gift I can offer a person is my time and patience. It’s not to say I don’t at times get impatient, but that I remind myself why I give it. 🎁

There’s someone I love dearly in my family who currently suffers from dementia. The #1 thing she says to me and with much gratefulness is: “Thank you for being so patient with me.” 🗣️

It tears me up to think how many others in our world feel insignificant because others won’t simply give them the time and patience when they’re doing their very best with the resources they have to work through a problem. 😢

We wouldn’t give a baby a limited amount of time and patience to learn how to walk. We wouldn’t throw in the towel and say: “This baby is hopeless! I got more important things to do!” 🤬

So why do we give this limited time to others? ⌛

One is because of our expectations about other people. For a baby, we expect walking for them will be a learning process. We expect they will poop in their diapers. We expect they will need to be spoon fed. We expect they will need a lot of time and patience. 🐣

But as we get older, we raise our expectations on how others “should” be. ♾

📍 “They should already know how to do this!”

📍 “They should know better!”

📍 “They should have high standards for their life!”

📍 “They should be just like who I am!”

There was a moment this weekend that tested my expectations. 📆

I had the privilege to serve a dozen kids as they experienced their very first Unleash the Power Within event. They all came from different locations, backgrounds, and lifestyles. 🌎

This weekend I learned a very valuable lesson from every of them. I learned I came into the group with far more expectations about where these kids “should” be in their personal development than I knew! 😲

Some of them had already dipped their toe in the water. But others were stepping in for the very first time. These ideas were brand new to them. And I was expecting too much of what they “should” know. 😔

But you cannot expect someone to learn Calculus when they’ve never learned Algebra. It has to be taken in steps. And as passionate as I am about personal development, I was challenged this weekend to remind myself how little I knew when I first attended the event myself. We all learn in different ways and at different paces. 👍

All the kids were beautiful souls who I know will go far in their lives. There’s a part of me that woke up this Monday morning and remembered I’m not going to the venue to reconnect with them. A part of me will miss that. 🙌

But I told them before I left them all yesterday: “Keep these memories here close. They are with you now wherever you go.” ❤️

If we are to get along with each other, patience is not a virtue.

🙌 PATIENCE IS NOT A VIRTUE! IT’S A NECESSITY! 🙌

Building this skill has become one of the most rewarding experiences for my life. 👍

You’ll connect with people on a deeper level. You’ll see parts of yourself in them. You’ll remember we’re all only human and we’re all still learning. 😊

🌟 Remember to meet people where they are at, not where you want them to be. 🌟

Because where there’s patience there’s also time for understanding. ❤️#EudaimonicLife

.

DONATE TO MY PATREONhttps://bit.ly/2HTZHpF