Why You Should BE OFFENDED!


If you’re offended, you know what: that’s FANTASTIC! 😲

I’m not kidding, being offended is AWESOME! 💯


No, seriously! I want you to find ways to be offended! BUT hear me out! 👂

Why the hell am I even saying that? That sounds ridiculous, right?! 🤨

🌟 Because when you feel offended, you have the opportunity to ask yourself: “Why?” 🌟

📖 “What upsets people is not things themselves but their judgments about the things.” ~ Epictetus 📖

Often times we are NOT aware why we are offended. Often times we are not even aware what judgments we are making about people, things, and situations in our lives. We simply just…be offended. 🤷‍♂️

Let’s put an end to that! 🛑

🌟 The fact we don’t understand our emotions is the very reason we need to feel them, so we can understand what’s going on beneath the surface. 🌟

Ask yourself: “WHY???” 🗣

📍 Did someone say something that went against your beliefs?

📍 Did a situation remind you of a past event where you felt hurt?

📍 Did you feel powerless and your body went into defense mode?

I can’t answer those questions for you. But the better you understand yourself and what offends you, the better you can handle those stressful responses in the future. 😄

Rather than be empowered through being offended, you can now be empowered through self-awareness! 💪

🌟 The answers to your “Why” are the reasons to your suffering. 🌟

I’m NOT saying be offended for the sake of being offended. We’ve just been missing this second step for far too long! 👏

I’m saying be offended…AND let it be your gateway towards introspection, towards a better understanding of yourself of your beliefs, your values, and your sense of identity. 👤

So please: Be offended…AND ask yourself “Why?” Just don’t forget the second step, okay?! ❤️

Why We NEED Competence!

Think of the person who is so confident they know how to do something…but then fails miserably when they actually do it! 😅

But think of the person who is so skilled on how to actually do something, yet they doubt their abilities to do it… 😨

So the confident person takes the competent person’s place! 😲

🌟 It’s important we remember Confidence and Competence are NOT the same thing. 🌟

Confidence is the belief in yourself to do something. Competence is in your actual ability to do something. ↔️

You can believe you know how to drive a car, yet simultaneously be horrible at it! You can believe you know how to be a leader, yet simultaneously have no one follow you! 😲

It’s important we remember this distinction, because it’s easy for us to be attracted to charismatic and confident leaders that under the surface can be completely incompetent. 💯

How often does this happen? How often do we appoint leaders based on their confidence and how they make us feel, rather than based upon their competence or character? 🤔

Philosopher Bertrand Russell once wrote in an essay in 1933 in response to the Rise of Nazi Germany: “The trouble with the modern world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.” ✍️

This quote always reminds me to stay humble, to stay open and remember I’m not flawless. I could in fact be wrong about many things. This quote is not only my reminder but a crucial one at that, when we remember what happened in the following decade with World War 2. 🩸

So this is my message to the Competent individuals out there…⬇️

There are people far less qualified getting the jobs you want! 👍

There are people far less competent in leadership positions you’d be amazing in! 👍

It’s not because they’re exceptionally talented. It’s not because they necessarily put in a ton of hard work. It’s because they’re confident in themselves, and people tend to follow confident people. 💯

If you step up, we could not only have Confident leaders but ones who are BOTH Confident AND Competent! You got this! 😄❤️

The #1 Valentine You CAN’T Forget!


What does today’s holiday mean to you?

💓 A time to share love with the people in your life?!

💘 A day to spend time with your significant other?!

💔 A holiday to remind you of the fact you’re “still single” and really need to be in a relationship?!

If your answer is #3, this message is especially for you. But this message is also for everyone! For all my single friends out there, me being a single man myself: I encourage you today not to fret! 😁

What if I told you, at age 28, I’ve NEVER been in a relationship…😱?!


But when I was in high school, I was DESPERATELY searching for one! 🔎

And not just in school; I was on ALL the dating sites and apps: Plenty of Fish, OkCupid, Tinder, etc. Trust me, I had them ALL covered! 😎

🗣️ “Why did you want a relationship so bad, Donald?!” 🗣️

At the time I didn’t really know, nor did it even cross my mind to ask myself why. All I knew was I just simply “wanted” to be in a relationship. I wanted to find that special someone who would make me happier. 🤷‍♂️

🌟 But therein laid the problem of my predicament: the expectation I held in my mind that a relationship would somehow “make me happier”. 🌟


Often we’re taught, especially in lots of romantic stories, that if we’re in a relationship, that somehow finding that “special someone”, will open up the heavens and you’ll have found the end of the rainbow. 😊

It’s quite romantic…but it’s not reflective of reality! 😅

It’s understandable we keep believing this idea: We tend to only see the POSITIVE moments in a couple’s relationship, on display in our social lives for all to see. 🖼️

We typically won’t hear about the negative or challenging moments that happen in relationships, what can go on behind-the-scenes. Who wants to hear about that, right?! 👍

So me, as a naive teenager, WHY WOULDN’T I want to be in a relationship? Things seem to be nothing but smooth sailing! It looks like fun! 😍

But it was around 3 years ago I actually made a big decision in my perspective regarding relationships. In fact, those dates sites I mentioned earlier, I UNINSTALLED and DELETED ALL my accounts off them! 😲

🗣️ “Why?!” 🗣️

Of all the countless hours I spent on those apps, I had finally become drained of my willingness to keep searching for a significant other. If I could take the ratio of time I spent browsing these apps to the amount of time I actually spent talking with someone, it would be like 500 to 1! 👎


Ultimately, my excessive searching was a time-waster! And the funniest part of it all: I made myself feel worse every time I logged off the app when I had no luck, blaming MYSELF for it! 😥

⚠️ I developed this bad habit, and I unintentionally reinforced to myself: “No one wants to talk to me! I feel even lonelier than I did before!” ⚠️

…And then holidays like Valentine’s Day came around each year. They would only FURTHER reinforce my self-pity that I wasn’t in a relationship. It SUCKED! 😫

So you may be asking: what was the “final straw” for you to make such a drastic change?


I had come to greater realizations about why I was “wanting” to be in a relationship:

⚠️ I believed being in a relationship was the answer to making me happier. ⚠️

⚠️ I believed that by being in a relationship, I could seek recognition and validation from others. ⚠️

⚠️ I believed that if I was in a relationship, someone would fill the void I felt inside myself. ⚠️

As awful as it sounds, I saw a relationship as a form of property, the other person merely being a poor substitute for a toy I thought would make me feel better. 🧸

But people aren’t objects! 💯 And owning material goods don’t make you fulfilled in the long-term! 💯

🚨 I realized my intentions for wanting to be in a relationship were far more SELFISH than SELFLESS. My intention was less about “WE” and more about “ME”. 🚨

How many of us get into a relationship primarily for selfish reasons? We need to seriously think about this! 💯

So in sharing my story with you all, I hope you see that sometimes what we’re actually looking for is not a relationship at all, but something much closer to home. 🏠


🌟 Don’t forget to develop a relationship with Yourself. 🌟

So for all my single friends out there, do not fret! Let me remind you:

❤️ Relationships are not all sunshine and rainbows. We often don’t see what goes on behind-the-scenes, the ongoing commitment that’s required, or the negative moments that can happen in one.

❤️ Inner happiness and fulfillment has to come from YOU first. Fill up your cup so you can easily share the rest with a future lover. If you can’t love yourself first, you can’t expect it to come from others. You’ll be waiting forever…

❤️ Self-love is one of the greatest gifts you can give. The only person you’re with 100% of your life…is Yourself. Learn to be comfortable in your own company.

❤️ Today is an opportunity for you to change your perspective about how you see relationships. They are not a means to an end, and not being in one DOES NOT mean you aren’t loved.

Make today a day for you to give love in whatever way you know best! For me, writing this post to share with you all is one of them! 😁



SHARE with someone who needs to hear this this Valentine’s Day! ❤️

Social Media: Why It’s OKAY to Not Be Okay! ❤️


…Except on social media where you must be flawless and show only your successes to gain social capital with your online peers! 😉







Okay, but serious talk now! ✋

I’m guilty of doing this too! Who DOESN’T want to feel appreciated and validated in their lives? 🤗

Even for the individual who claims they don’t want Significance, to some extent no matter how small they still do. 👍 They may even be getting their Significance need by ACTING like they don’t need Significance! 😅

I’m reminded of the words of William James: “The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.” 👤

So yes, we all need Significance! The only difference is in how we prioritize this need in our lives. ⚖️

If Significance is at the top of our list, we’ll make it a mental priority to find ways to be in the spotlight. 🥇 Regardless of what we say or do, whether we play the Victim or Victor Card, our primary motivations are to be at the center of attention! 📸


However, if our Significance need is near the bottom of our list, we won’t mind remaining in the background. Our primary motivation is not about “being seen”. It may still feel nice, but it’s not very important. 🤷‍♂️

(You may also be very likely NOT on social media! 🤣)


Alas, I have fallen into the same traps online I openly critique 🙋‍♂️. I DO like to focus on sharing the positives on my profile. I DO like to display more of my successes than my failures. 👍

I think it’s quite easy for us all to do this on a platform where we’re 100% in control of what we want to share with others. 💯

On a platform which can provide Significance to us on a global scale, why would anyone be inclined to share their common humanity, not the least of which includes the not-too-sexy details of our lives? There’s a safe bet it wouldn’t benefit us, right? 👎

So in this respect, we’ve all created artificial versions of ourselves online, some more honest than others, and some not even real at all! 🤖

Think of the social media profile where you can’t distinguish whether the person you’re messaging with is genuine or a person who’s only developing rapport with you because you are their next potential business customer. 🤑

Unfortunately, we are limited to the online realities with which each person presents us with 💻.

🚘 It doesn’t matter if a person is actually rich; they can pose next to a sports car and give us the impression they are.

🙌 It doesn’t matter if a person is actually generous; they can take a photo at a charity event and give us lip service that they are.

👤 It doesn’t matter if a person is actually the person they claim to be; they can present you with limited segments of their life that reinforce their claims.

From the Upanishads: “We are like the dreamer who dreams and then lives inside the dream.” 💭


So while in real life we’re limited to how we know others, it’s not at all to the same extent online. Online we’re required to fill in far more holes about other people, compared to talking directly with them face-to-face. 👫

➡️ So no matter how hard we try, we can’t escape the fact that social media doesn’t place an equivalence to the mundanities of real life connections, ones which can be quite messy, ones which take a long time to develop into meaningful relationships, ones which someone’s personality cannot so easily be hidden as behind their social media profile. ⬅️


My point is the quote I’ve repeated 3 times and will now repeat for a 4th time…😅


Once we’ve logged off our social medias, quit out of our videogames, turned off our TVs, closed our books, and awoke from our fantasy worlds, what is left? Our real lives.

📍 We’re faced once again with the reality we’re still fundamentally unhappy.

📍 We’re faced once again with the reality that life still has down moments, no matter how much we wish they didn’t exist.

📍 We’re faced once again with the reality that life can be REALLY HARD at times.

Online it’s easy to see our friends and compare ourselves to them. It was a big problem for me for a while too! I saw where my friends were traveling, I saw how happy they looked, I saw them sharing all the achievements they made…and it made me wonder: “Is there something wrong with me?” 😔

It made me hold myself to a standard of perfection which could never be met!

So before this paradigm negatively affects another person, I write this status to BREAK the paradigm. 💥

🚨 Social Media is NOT real life and it never will be!

🚨 NO ONE will ever be 100% real online (not even me)!

🚨 You rarely will see people share their failures online! But EVERY PERSON still has their share whether they admit it or not (again, me too)!

🚨 Your self-worth NO LONGER has to be dependent comparing yourself to others! We’re all on individual paths; I want you to create your own path and dare to be original!

Last, and most importantly:


I say this because your emotions will ALWAYS be a part of your life. I give you FULL PERMISSION to accept the emotions you’re currently feeling! 💯

If meditation has taught me anything, it’s that acceptance of whatever you feel is the 1st step to effectively working with your emotions. But I’ll save those details for a future post…🧘‍♂️

I at times am conflicted each time I post online. While I aim to keep my social media real, I also acknowledge I may simultaneously be contributing to the very problems I criticize. An eye for an eye! 👀

But if what I post is worth anything, it’s that at least 1 person reads them and says: “I’m glad I read this today!” ❤️

For many of us that use social media mindlessly, what if we collectively starting using it as a Force for Good? ✊

Think of Mr. Fred Rogers, who wasn’t fond of the mindless entertainment kids were getting on TV, so he decided to use the platform to entertain AND teach life lessons. How many of you fondly remember “Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood”? 🙋‍♂️

No, I’m not saying we all need to be Mr. Rogers for Social Media! 😅 What I’m saying is what if we all started using this platform for something more meaningful, more heartfelt, and a bit less for Significance and Sales? I wonder how much of a difference we could make! 🌎

Even behind a computer screen, we still have the potential to be an example to inspire others to be better people. Mr. Rogers still did behind a television screen. 😉

It all starts with your next post…❤️

And for those less inclined to read this lengthy post, on a platform where visuals and clickbait are primary drivers to grab your attention, here’s just an aesthetically pleasing modeling photo for your eyes to enjoy! 😜